Grace In Our Miscarriage

Nick and Sarah Minerva • Dec 20, 2020

This post is written by both my wife and myself. 

This past October we found out we were expecting our fifth child. Even though the thought of five kids seemed a bit scary, we were excited! The first ultrasound is always something I (Nick) really look forward to because it’s like meeting your child for the first time. The first time you get to hear your baby’s heartbeat is so special, and seeing their tiny little body wiggle around up on the ultrasound monitor is life-changing.


The Wednesday after Thanksgiving was our first ultrasound, and we both were anxious to meet our little baby. During the ultrasound the nurse began measuring the different parts of the baby to make sure the baby’s growth was on track and that everything was normal. When she got to the baby’s heart, the monitor came up ready to display the heartbeat, but nothing happened. No line moving up and down. No quick sound of a rushing little organ pumping life-giving blood through the tiny developing body. The nurse asked me (Sarah) to hold my breath and I did. Still nothing. We just looked at each other, knowing the results, but hoping we were wrong. The nurse quickly moved on, unable to share any results with us. She finished the ultrasound and then had us sit in a waiting room. Alone with fear and worry about what we thought just happened. A bit later we were told we could leave and that we would get a call from our Doctor. Later that afternoon we got the call that confirmed our fears. We had lost our baby. 


The days that followed were difficult. They still are. Passing the baby’s body at home wasn’t our first choice, but it was what we had to do and it was traumatic. (A special thank you to the people who watched our kids for us and brought us meals.) Our emotions were (and still are) all over the place. But we are learning that living a life of worship through pain and difficulty is one of the most faith-filled things we can do. Oswald Chambers said “Faith is the deliberate confidence in the character of God whose ways you may not understand at the time.” There is definitely a lot of things we don’t understand right now. But what we do know about the character of God is carrying us through. 


Whenever we walk through things we don’t understand we can lean on the goodness and love of God. That is something we know. The cross forever settled that. When we can’t look at our circumstances and say they are good, we can look at our God and say he is. Because God is good, we can trust in his control when we don’t like or understand what is going on. Walking through this miscarriage has been a continual exercise in resting in God’s sovereignty. Regardless of the goodness of our circumstances, we can trust in the goodness of God’s character. Resting in God’s sovereignty doesn’t deny our emotions or circumstances, it just speaks a bigger truth. The truth that God can be trusted. (Romans 8:28)


Knowing our little baby is in the presence of Jesus has brought us so much comfort (1 Thessalonians 4:13). One of the most real truths of our lives is that God has secured for us a glorious end. We don’t know what is going to happen on the next page of our story, but we have read the back of the book and it is filled with God’s presence and fullness of joy. Nothing the world can offer or take away can compare with that, and because of that we can worship God. We can endure the difficult twists and turns this life throws at us because we know the end. Knowing how Jesus has secured our end, and our little baby’s end, is what allows us to worship him in the present. Even though our present is hard and filled with grief, there will come a day when every tear will be wiped away and we will meet our baby face to face in the presence of our Savior. And that grace is what allows us to endure our present suffering with hope.

 

A Creed To Remind The Gathered Church Of Its New Life In Christ

By Nick Minerva • 14 Jul, 2023
When I was pastoring I wanted to read a blessing over the church that would remind all of us of our new life in Christ. So I wrote this new life creed and every week I would read it and remind us of what Christ had done for us. We gather together as believers professing our great need We acknowledge that we have fallen short We confess that we are rebels who have gone our own way Apart from Christ, we stand condemned, guilty, and unable to save ourselves But what we are incapable of doing, God did In his infinite love, God made a way of salvation for all who would believe Jesus willingly laid down his life and received the just punishment we deserve So that could walk in new life So yes, we confess our great need We humbly recognize that apart from Christ we are incapable of any good thing But we also proclaim that because of the finished work of the cross we will never be apart from Christ We are forever secure in the love of the Father We have been sealed by the Holy Spirit All because of the sacrifice of the Son, Jesus Christ. We are no longer in bondage to sin We are no longer facing righteous wrath We have been declared holy by our King And nothing on heaven or earth will change that reality This gathering is a testimony to our redeemed state We pursue holy living to be an authentic demonstration of the love we have for Christ We believe that we have been empowered by grace to meet our every need And we gladly anticipate the complete fulfillment of our adaption and the remaking of this world at the coming of our Lord To Christ be glory forever and ever Amen

A Praying Church: A Book Review

By Nick Minerva • 23 May, 2023
Prayer is one of those topics that always seems to convict me. I have never heard a sermon or read a book on prayer and not been challenged. Even as I am writing this review there is a bit of imposter syndrome because I know I should pray more. In A Praying Church , Paul Miller writes about how to become a people of hope in a discouraging world through prayer. And he does so in a way that was very authentic and accessible. While I was consistently challenged, I was also consistently encouraged. Throughout the book, he takes you on his journey of developing a personal prayer life plus countless stories of ministries that developed communal prayer as a vital component of their life together. One thing that struck home with me throughout these stories was the reality that prayer always grows out of desperation for God. There were several things that I found very helpful in this book. One of them was the connection between a life yielded to the Holy Spirit and a vibrant prayer life. The power to do anything of eternal importance comes from the Holy Spirit and the Spirit moves in response to prayer. Paul shows us a biblical pattern we see throughout the New Testament. Prayer-Spirit-Jesus-power. However, this is not a simple formula to get God to do what you want. Another thing I appreciated about this book is Paul tells us time and again that the Spirit often moves in ways we don’t expect and that almost always includes difficulties. The Spirit enables us to look more like Jesus and that means joining him in the fellowship of his suffering. So this is not a “how to turn God into your personal genie” scheme, like many books on prayer. God often answers in ways we don’t expect and in places we don’t anticipate. This book is also full of practical help. I’ve already mentioned the stories he tells, but Paul also offers several helpful charts, strategies, and ideas to help put into place what he writes about (and lives by.) At the end of each chapter, he has a section called “A Word To Pastors” with a few paragraphs of wisdom to help them become a person of prayer and then lead their congregation to become a church of prayer. This book also made me thankful that I am a part of a church that has sought to grow in corporate prayer over the last few years. This would be a great book for any ministry leader who is burdened with the prayer life of his or her church. But it’s also a great read for any believer seeking to develop their own prayer life. Crossway was kind to send me a free copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. You can get a copy of it at the affiliate link below.

Non-Toxic Masculinity: A Book Review

By Nick Minerva • 28 Apr, 2023
Let me start this review by saying everyone should read this book. If you've grown up in Evangelicalism, you‘ve no doubt heard of purity culture. For the last several years we have seen the harm that has come as a result of this sub-group of Christianity. In Non-Toxic Masculinity, Zachary Wagner does an excellent job unpacking its teaching and the damage that has come as a result. He explains so well the angst I've been feeling with the movement and how often the Church falls short and winds up doing more damage. But unlike many critiques, this one also points a way forward. We know what toxic male sexuality looks like. We see it in the news and unfortunately, in the Church. But what does healthy male sexuality look like? What does it look like for me? What will it look like for my boys? In my heart, I know what I want it to look like, but so often I struggle to find the right words to express it. Non-Toxic Masculinity paints a healthy picture that is (re)humanizing and ultimately looks like Jesus, who, like all of us, had a sexual body. Zach is also very transparent in this book and God used his transparency to encourage, challenge, and convict me. As you read his story you will no doubt find yourself resonating with him on some level. Every man should read this book for themselves first and foremost. But if you have sons, nephews, grandsons, or young boys in your life, reading it is a must. Non-Toxic Masculinity is a breath of fresh air that will prove to be a tremendous resource for generations. Thank you Zach for writing it and sharing your story to serve us.
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